Have not been blogging for few days due to emotional breakdown. I am quite emotional person. Used to be very emotional. Through the years, I try to be more rational and get over my sad feelings quickly. Sometimes it works, sometimes don’t. Well, I am just a human.
Last few days I watched Oprah on tv during my lunch break. I love Oprah. She always give me motivation and inspiration to be a better person in this world. Independent, strong, confident, wise and etc. I guess the talk show really gives impact on me and my life. It is important to have the confident within yourself in order for you to move on, compete with others in this challenging world.
I am not a risk taker and I know my self-confidence is quite low. I know in future I have to be more confident in order for me to teach students in the uni. I am quite scared to think of the huge responsibilities later on. Tutoring is different. Demonstrating is not as serious as teaching. Giving real knowledge to others. A noble thing. I do not want to give my student a wrong information. Apart from that, I am not that strict person. am quite soft hearted person. I hope my students dont give me a hard time. hehe. I dont like to scold people or be tough. I am quite lenient actually. I might use a lot of psychology to tackle my students. I guess. hehe.
Back to the confidence subject, whenever you feel demotivated or frustated with life, it is good to do something ‘out of the box’ to boost or gain back your confidence. Besides that, you will look at the matter from different perspectives and will be more appreciative and grateful with what you have. For instance, sky diving. It is a risky and scariest thing for most people. You have to trust other people to guide you in order for you to survive the task. And it took a big courage to jump from a plane at 15,000 feet in the air! Most people dont dare to try it. But once you try it, your perspectives will change. You will feel like nothing in this world that you cannot do! Most of the volunteers feel the same way. They feel much more confident with themselves. Feel like a new person just emerged from themselves. Like they have been hiding before this. I think I want to try sky diving one day. Lets just try paragliding first. See whether I can up to the challenge or not. hehe. :p
The truth is sometimes you just get tired with your life. And certain things are so annoying. Most of the things is uncertain. Everything is just not right for you right now. I just feel like I am at the lowest part of my life. You know you have to move on but you just dont know how. The harder you try, the worst it becomes. You don’t want to quit but the pressure is too much to handle. And the decision is not yours to decide. As you are dealing with so many people in your life, things are just too complicated. Let’s pray for a better tomorrow. I just hope that my spirit will keep me going on for a little while. Hang on there dear!
p/s: I might find new activities to challenge myself. Maybe Kickboxing will do.:-)